Parenting is such an art. Often I wish it was a science – when your child misbehaves you do x,y,z, they change the behavior, and life goes on all smiles and sunshine. 

But each child is different. And each situation is different. Of all the parenting books and whatnot that I have read, this one is my favorite. I like the approach of letting real life, in the form of natural consequences, be the teacher.

I was reminded of a story this week from when my Grandpa, Harold (mom’s dad), was a little boy. He and his brothers were playing in their yard throwing rocks, and he threw one at a car passing by which broke the windshield. 

He got in trouble, and because his parents had to pay to repair the car window, he didn’t get any birthday presents (he was turning 8.)

I don’t think I could ever not give my child a birthday present, but you know, I think letting kids experience real life consequences can be pretty okay for them. My grandpa lived through it and turned out to be a pretty great person. 

I was musing over this on Valentine’s Day after one of my children (who I’ll leave nameless) snitched treats out of the kitchen they were specifically told not to eat. So Landon and I decided the most immediate and relative consequence would be for them to miss out on dessert that evening (and we made lava cakes – so delicious.) I felt a little bad for not letting said child have dessert when everyone else was eating it, but then I think of the story of my Grandpa and the rock and the loss of birthday presents and I realize, I want my child to grow up to be a person of character more than I want them to have what they want right now. 

I hope that they grow into the best people they can be, people who live with integrity, and do the right thing, even when it’s not the easiest thing.